Monday 22 June 2015

Greek Flower-Power

A long-going saga that feels equal in length to the once great Empire's rule over our civilisation - now reaching levels of quite boring monotony unfortunately, the likes of which great warriors of that ancient time never imposed upon us. Greece is once again on the brink. Hello? have I travelled back to 2010..enough already..Pay up or shut up!

Seriously my Greek friends (disclaimer: there are traces of Greek ancestry in my blood, somewhere), a little less time in the Bouzoukia (famous live-music entertainment nightclubs in Athens) and more in the office! Rather than spending mind-numbing nights of "entertainment" in a large money-laundering operation full of beautifully dressed women covered in flower petals, your flashy cars parked outside and looking as if they were literally driven out of the showroom - probably were and need to be driven back soon minus -30% for a "facilitation fee" about tapping into what once made you that great People, pay some taxes, work a little harder, spend less time on Instagram expressing your love for Bieber and all things Greek - no, the iPhone was not derived from a Greek invention, you can't "G-originate" that one sorry!

Face the reality of years and years (still ongoing) of tax evasion, dodgey enterprises exactly like the Bouzoukia you frequent - literally flimsy covers for excessive "expense claim" based tax evasions..why on earth would someone rather pay €20 for a plate of flower petals to throw over one another than at least a bottle of champagne that can be playfully sprayed!? - and deal with an issue that your 1% have sadly forced the rest to face. That's the truth of it, no matter how many times you try to blame Merkel for forcing you into a corner. She is far too smart to give in to your nationalistic uproar and far too tough to look kindly upon the lazy Greek yacht-dwellers that initially created most of this mess.

What if I told you we could solve the Greek debt payment issue (c.€1.7bn immediately) by throwing some more flowers?  Stay with me...1 Bouzouki Flower Plate costs €20 right? On one night in Athens I personally witnessed €30,000 stupidly..ah sorry..lavishly spent on covering a bevy of excited Greek ladies dancing around some singer. So...let's throw several massive parties for the Greek Elite ( guys..classy) hiking the prices of those flower plates to €500/plate, invite nothing but scantily-clad models who just want to party, then sit back, switch on the music and watch the tight-shirted Greek boys go berserk in the Bouzoukia. The night would require the purchase of 3.4m plates to fill the €1.7bn hole..easy peasy..HOPA!

Come on my Greek friends..grow some Taylor Swift sized balls and go out there and fight for your rights, get your act together, stop relying upon others to provide you with your own way out of a mess that was simply created by the corrupt nature of a disconnected elite and please please stop wasting so many of our articles and media commentaries on the same story..let's move on!